Nightime visit
by moonygarou
Summary: No words were needed, this feeling already said enough. Slash


**Disclaimer:** I don't own this, I don't want to make any money with this, the characters belong to our dear JK Rowling, I only own the plot.

**Warnings:** This contains slash folks, don't like it don't read it. Secondly this story contains some OoTp spoilers. You've been warned.

~*~

I walked quietly along the floor, darkness surrounding me, the silence filling me like a safe that keeps me away from anything happy from this world. Even the knowledge that I haven't got to live with the Dursley's and neither at the Grimmauld place doesn't sooth my mind with worries and sorrow.

A silent tears flows down my cheek, the closest way I come across reality at the moment. People say I spend too much time in isolation, other's tell me I should be careful and not to throw myself every time in danger. Then there are those who don't say anything at all, those who follow me by night and day, those who think I can't take care of myself.

I stop for a second and look around, trying to make sure that nobody is following me, that nobody is watching me. I sigh in relief as I notice that I am all alone, alone with this pain and this anguish that is flooding my soul, but most of all my heart.

Have I forgotten how to love? No I never really learnt how to, that emotion everybody is talking about, forbidding us to explore, is what I don't understand. I envy the people that were allowed to explore and feel this feeling before.

The silent tear isn't alone anymore and a second, then a third, a fourth and final a fifth one follows. Yes I am scared but most off all I don't want to continue with this all. I don't want to fight this war just because my name is Harry Potter, I don't want to be me anymore.

Why couldn't I have died instead of Sirius? Why can't I be just a normal person, who nobody knows about, who nobody talks about and where I am the boss of my own, and am allowed to rule this life on my own?

My brain is muddled; my mind confused and I had nearly forgotten what I wanted to do. 

I continue to walk and finally reach the door of my destination. Is this right? I don't know, but maybe I also don't care. Such a long time now I have been alone, alone in this dark and now I want to stop it. Want to stop this pain, want to stop to feel weak and most off all I want to learn how it feels to be loved.

I took all my courage together and as quiet as possible open the door. Moonlight is filling the room, my eyes scanning the room until they fell on top of the man lying on the bed there in front of me. As quiet as I opened it, I closed the door and as my eyes fell upon the other man again, I take a shocking step back as I see his eyes gaze upon me and a small smile.

Lying on his side he lifts up a little the blanket, gesturing me to lie down next to him. At first I don't know what to do, I suddenly feel so small and timid not really knowing what to do. Subconsciously I take small timid steps towards the bed until I suddenly find myself in on his bed next to him, under the blanket and in his arms.

I abruptly don't feel so vulnerable anymore, but safety and comfort evade my senses, like the warm blanket that is laying upon us two. But maybe it also comes from his hand, which is stroking along my back in a comforting rhythm in that I melt.

I don't dare to move and only close my eyes scared that he may stop those reassuring caresses. I don't know what to do as I suddenly feel his hand slip inside my pants and softly move over my buttocks, so lightly that I hardly could feel it.

Could it be true that he felt the same way like I did?

My thoughts were suddenly erased as I felt his hand, that only moment ago had been on my back, was now on my face, tracing soft patterns upon it. His finger trailed first across my eyebrows, then down my nose, across my closed eyelids, along my cheek and then… then they were tenderly touching my lips.

A shiver ran down my spine as he continues to touch my lips. What is this I am suddenly feeling? So much, so much is whirling through my mind and most off all happiness.

I can't think properly anymore as I suddenly feel his lips upon mine, kissing me. I respond the kiss, not really knowing how. But I guess it can't be too bad as he doesn't stop and only encourages me on as I feel his tongue licking my lips. I open my lips slightly letting him explore my mouth.

As we part I open my eyes looking into amber eyes that shine with love and devotion, and my heart jumps at the realization the I finally won't be alone anymore, and I smile as I can feel this new sensation filling me up from inside, making me feel, making me feel whole.

I rest my head on his chest, letting his heart lull me to sleep. We both not saying a words, as words aren't needed as this feeling already says enough.


End file.
